[14 Dec 2009|07:23am] mochachoca What? Nothing, I had a bad day. Alright, so what are we doing? We are stealing a car. Here? No I just had some shopping to do. Yes, here. Don’t be fuckin’ stupid. Well I mean it’s a car lot. It’s well lit and there are cameras all over the place, you’re calling me stupid? They’re off. How do you know? Jimmy said they’d be off tonight; it’s okay. Oh yeah? Yeah come on. So if there’s no cameras on then why is it that the little red light up there is blinking? I don’t know. That means it’s on. You know what? To me, that little red light means nothing. That’s its ‘off’ light. I’m gonna call Jimmy. Don’t call him in the middle of the night. What do you want me to do? Steal a car with my fucking face on a camera? Look I'll make sure in the morning and he can have Doug take it out before they check the tapes. Fine, whatever. Just don’t forget. Let me know when you’re off your period. Which car is it? I don’t know we gotta find it. Then what does it look like? It’s like a navy blue. So it’s blue like my jeans, that narrows it down. No, your jeans are too dark. It’s much lighter. This is navy blue. That sign is normal blue. What the hell kind of blue are you talking about? I don’t know, like a sky color. You mean sky blue? What do I look like some fuckin’ interior design moron? No Mitch you look like a regular moron. It’s light blue. It’s fuckin’ blue okay? You have a model? Looks like a Chevrolet. I don’t see it. That’s why we walk, that’s why there’s two of us. Get going. post comment

it's give up time [07 Dec 2009|01:10am] mochachoca time to give up. i gave up on friday when i realized i've done nothing for myself all of my college career. i gave up even earlier when i realized i am in no way someone who is creative. i'm an imitator and i imitate what i see around me that is successful. colored by the people i spend time with i have been spending time with lame-ass boring ass people who do nothing for themselves. my time of self-discovery this semester was a waste of time at this point i can't even find it in me to write a paper. i should grow a couple more feet in case i run out of something to shoot myself in. i can't tell if i'm crumbling, accepting, or just falling victim to the outer space of my last few weeks in college. just like senioritis. but i was done with school last may-- at least i should have been. this is embarrassing now. not only have i wasted an entire four months of my life extensively dicking around in school rather than growing up and getting a job, i also made no use of my time here except to piss it away doing nothing but twisting my foot in the dirt while i think about my identity, like it matters. i could have at least been making friends but that's stupid too what use is there in making friends during the last 5 minutes of my school life when i won't even be around to make use of them once i'm gone. how fucking retarded that idea is. as if in some way i belong here anymore. i really don't and the ghost of me is just doing a disservice to my integrity by putzing around on fuckjournal.com going 'everything is pretty lame for me' while i should be getting off my ass and writing some papers for school. i can't figure out what to write tho. i'm having an identity crisi right now because i'm giving in to giving up. i'm not going to be a part of the industry my major is for because i jsut can't i suck, for one. my body sucks for two. and thirdly if i wanted to be so awesome at whatever the hell i thought i wanted to do then i'd be doing it instead of sitting around wondering why my life is continually beginning at square one. so once i graduate i'll start studying for air traffic control so that i can secure a job with insurance and take that to run with so i can make money and play video games for a few years until i die. at least i won't be wearing myself to the bone looking for work over five years like everyone else in the entertainment business. that would surely see that i die, bur i like wintertime a lot so i'd rather see a handful of christmases before it's all over don't talk to me about it tho. it's not important if you feel like you need to. i don't even know what to say in the first place. i'm just happier letting the world around me create while i give it a break from lamely recreating the things i think are awesome 1 comment|post comment

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